Aren’t we unique as humans in being able to irritate and annoy our fellow beings? Well. Let’s think of the other beings residing this planet. Won’t you quickly conclude that none of them can accomplish the task as perfectly as we do. Almost on an everyday basis, we grab all the opportunities to hone this prized skill. How ardent a follower of the idiom “Practice makes a man perfect” all of us seem to be.
Don’t be scared though. I am just an average performer. Not a greatly annoying person, I think. Some others I know are definitely way ahead and can be called chart busters. In spite of this semi correct self assessment of my self, I do at times suffer from a feeling of being wronged. Let me take you through a quick detour of my skill set. On a personal level, I am sure that the top slot can very well be mine. One impediment in the path of my celebrity hood is that I have not garnered enough public attention so far. The day I succeed in having that, the top slot can very well be mine.
Anyway, for the time being you be the judge. Let me know if I am the one who has what it takes to win the race? Would be nice to have a sincere thought from you about this.Any suggestions about how to be a chart buster are most welcome. I would seriously include that in my ‘to do’ list.
1. In the Driver’s Seat-
Be it a friendly conversation, a debate or an online chat, if you have committed the misdemeanor of pinging me, please beware. At times it might happen that for every ten words you speak or type, I respond with thirty from my side. Unless strongly rebuked or politely pointed to, I can go on till the point you either run away saying “Ok..we will meet again” or walk away quietly saying “Gotta go…see you!!”. In fact, I have seen some panting and heaving a sigh of relief once they have walked a certain distance after the torture.
2. Majnu’s Dress-
I know so well about dressing correctly for an occasion. Have been to a missionary school which was extremely particular about our uniform, the tie and the polished shoes. I used to be perfectly dressed all the time and was never reprimanded for it. Once out of school, I never looked back. I choose all the nonsense for my clothes. Looking at myself, I have realized very well that I am a failure in as far as inculcating a proper dressing sense is concerned. I have actually done wonders at some parties and formal functions. I also know that I have traversed a path from where I can’t go back unless I attend some stupid capsule course that combines body language/ personality development classes. The best part – I am often the best dressed when I spend the entire day alone in my room. Can you beat this?
3. Plans that never work-
My friends (some of them definitely know it so well) I think are done with me about this. None of the plans I ever make were to succeed if I was the one to execute them. I have gone for trips, movies and local excursions with friends and most of them begin with a typical scene where all of them curse me for being late, being unsure, being over/under prepared, being stupid or better still being ill-dressed!
4. Been there done that–
I have not been anywhere and have not done anything. Yet I listen to people and friends with that obviously fake expression on my face. So much so that the narrator often is left thoroughly sorry to have raised a matter for conversation with me. I cannot recall any story that any of my ‘not so close’ friends have narrated to me. I have paid sincere attention to….well… hardly any of them. When it comes to the smallest detail of any vague thing that I have done or an absolutely meager feat that I have achieved, I act too smart and make friends listen to it all.
Artists I love, authors I have read, songs I listen to, films I have seen, stories I know of are the best ones. Period..Everything else that has not made it to my list is mediocre. Quick to judge, write off (and depending on the closeness with the friend) quick to make fun of is my trait. I sparingly do this, but when I do so, I really can do so. Thanks to my friends who have always ignored this madness I am so capable of unleashing. It is a hard-earned expertise and had to make to the top five.
Well there are a few more. I hope this should suffice for the day. Before you begin to abhor this loud and proud exhibition, I should say “its OK…its a part of being human”.
What about yourself do you find annoying ??